There was no carriage this time, a light appeared in the busy student town square as Helena Baker spawned into the world of Albion Online. Her presence was the condition to get the Black Guard out of Castle Academy.
“My name is Helen Baker. I have been sent to oversee operations here as part of the Black Guard. However during my presence here I shall be known simply as Helena.”
Helen introduced herself to me as if she had met me for the first time. This was probably for the better. However, what I wanted to ask her about was her outfit.
“If you are with the Black Guard now then why aren’t you wearing their uniform?”
“Isn’t that obvious, it’s the same as with my name, just as you are blending into the player base as a human, I will be blending into this world as an NPC.”
Rather than the black kilted Scottish uniform, Helen was wearing a nurse uniform except that it wasn’t a normal nurse uniform. The torso was covered in a giant red cross, and the short skirt and sleeves left little to imagination. Her cleavage however was disappointingly well covered. Also in her hand she was holding a giant syringe.
“It’s themed after World War II nurse uniforms. I designed it myself with the character generator. Do you like it?”
By default the generator takes a player’s appearance but it allows players to make some minor cosmetic changes. For example, she had changed her hair colour and increased her breast size from G-cup to H-cup. As the creator of this game, I could easily glean such changes. Well, if WWII soldiers saw that outfit they might be distracted from their duties. On the other hand it might serve as motivation. However such an outfit might also lead to harassment, especially if she intends to pretend to be an NPC.
“Yes, it’s lovely and I do like it but I might not be the only one who takes a liking to it.”
“That is why you will have to protect me, Mr Raynar.”
“Excuse me?”
“Well, I protected and looked after you in the real world, now it’s your turn. Also, these are Prime Minister Chamberlain’s orders, neither of us can go against them.”
While I had some questions about what she meant when she “protected” me, given that now I am dead, I knew that in such a way lies useless arguments over definitions. I didn’t have time and luxury for useless philosophical or ethical arguments.
“But weren’t you sent to look after the Castle Academy?”
“Yes, I will look over what’s going on there too but obviously I can’t look over everything that’s going on over there. That’s your maid’s ability right?”
“But if you are going to pretend to be an NPC then it wouldn’t make sense for you to hang out around me all the time. The players would grow suspicious. I am hogging the top player spot in the game with my cheat skills. It’s hard enough already to assuage their suspicions that I am not who I say I am.”
“Polygamy is allowed in this game in order to placate the muslim minority, right?”
Well, that was quite the abrupt change of topic.
“And players are allowed to marry NPCs right?”
“Well, yes but what about it?”
“Do I have to come out and say it, I am proposing to you that we should get married in the game.”
“Whaaaat!?” “Whaaat!?”
These were the voices of two characters who had been hiding while spying on us from behind a bush. We got up from the bench overlooking the artificial lake and turned around. It was the two usual suspects.
“But you don’t even love him like I do!”
“I refuse to give permission to one of those who tortured Papa to marry him! No, I do not consent!”
Maybe I should have made the student council members male.. No, that could have also gone in a different direction that I would regret. Now I needed to deal with these two before rejecting Helen’s proposal.
“Didn’t I order you two to wait inside?”
“Wait, they are allowed to disobey your orders?”
“No, but they can use previous orders and directives that I have given them to contradict my orders, so long as they deem it acts in my interest.”
“But, isn’t that really dangerous?”
I picked up Lain and Celestina by their collars, one in each hand, like a mother cat would pick up a kitten by its scruff.
“Yes, but a bunch of mindless robots who obeyed all my orders would have been a pain to micromanage and would lead to unintended consequences too. Although I am disappointed by their lack of trust in my judgement.”
“No, no, I just don’t want you to be fooled again by that thieving cat!”
“Father, you shouldn’t really trust real women. They are homewreckers!”
